Level my head, am I tilted?

Level my head,
Level my head,please it hurts.
I can't contain these demons they are breaking this gate.
It's like the back of your head is gonna rip open you struggle to keep it level.
Your cerebrum is giving up it's throwing all rationals up,
Those angels left me years ago they thought I don't deserve their divinity.
They spat in my eyes and said I don't deserve to see his grace.

I don't mind stealing grace,
I don't mind instill disgrace,
If it put my mind at ease,
If it put my chest some peace,
If it put my head level.

It's on the table the knives are calling my name,
Look at you now you are begging for freedom from killing,
You're falling apart my dear,
You're built to presevere yet you look for self deterioration,

This is all just an imagination,
Remember I am some fragile creation,
Go through everyday with some patience,
Even though your soul is so far away stationed,
You're skipping them motion by motion,
Managing pieces of numbness for everyday like rations,
Where's the calmness? I need it in form of potions,
Make it compulsory like lessons for clean soul sanitation,

Fuck that.

All I have is this one last chance,
And this I carry everyday like its last,
With you the catalyst I can't find my way to you,
This crooked eyesight this tilted head ruined me,
Help me I'm hungry for some redemption,
Level my head Mr. Righteous,
My left side are all logically tilted,
Level my head please.